365 Days of Gratitude Photoblog

Tuesday, I am grateful...

2008-08-19T01:33:00.002-05:00

...for going home for a little holiday.

I miss my family and old friends. I miss seeing the stars at night and the occasional northern lights. I miss the sunsets of the prairies and how the sky and land makes me feel free.

I hate leaving my dog. I know he is in good hands but I still don't like being apart from him. It makes me terribly sad. Toshio has certainly made Montreal feel much more like HOME.

I probably won't have the time or internet connection to post gratitude entries. Unless my parents' neighbors have their wireless not very secure or I make my way to the library. We shall see. Don't be alarmed if there are no posts! It just means that I'm having a lovely time and don't want to spend it in front of a computer!

Monday, I am grateful...

2008-08-19T01:31:00.002-05:00

...for spending the day with my two favorite people in the world.

Sunday, I am grateful...

2008-08-19T01:29:00.002-05:00

...for having the bed to myself on a lazy Sunday morning. Here's to sleeping like a starfish!

Saturday, I am grateful...

2008-08-19T01:25:00.003-05:00

In lieu of photograph, today I will be posting a link to a website I found on Saturday.

As I was surfing the internet with help of Firefox's StumbleUpon, I came across a wonderful non-profit organization called The Mother Bear Project.

The Mother Bear Project invites knitters and crocheters to create a teddy bear (you can buy the pattern off their website) for children from struggling nations who have HIV/AIDS. I was very touched by this idea - the comfort of a teddy bear for a child - and ordered the pattern right away. I will admit, my knitting skills are not that great but I'll make a trial run at it and see what happens.

Please, crafty friends, go to the website now!

Friday, I am grateful...

2008-08-19T01:21:00.002-05:00

...for tea with new friends.

Nope, I do not have a photo of my tea set. Or even a mug. Note to self - upload photos soon!

Thursday, I am grateful...

2008-08-14T17:50:00.003-05:00

...for finally getting my chance to see my favorite musician of all time - Mr. Leonard Cohen.

Yes, this post has been a long time coming. I saw him in June so it might be old news to some of you. However, I am still grateful for seeing him even after a few months. All I could say is "le sigh"!

Of course, if I could go back in time, I would prefer to have seen Leonard Cohen back in the late 60's or 70's. I ended up getting into Leonard Cohen after his last show in Winnipeg - my guess would be back in 1993. I always said, if ever I get the chance to see him it would have to be in his hometown of Montreal. Who would have thought I would end up living in his hometown! It worked out perfectly.

The night was lovely. It was something else, something magical, to finally hear his voice and see him sing right before my very eyes. It sent shivers across my skin. I didn't care too much for his back-up musicians but the man himself was wonderful! It was a perfect summer night, as well. People were out celebrating the beginnings of the Jazz Fest. He was very humble on stage and you could tell that he was very happy to play in his home city. Outside of the theatre, there were spotlights shining on all the buildings around the venue - one of young Leonard's face, one of him now, and another that had his lyrics written on the wall of the building. It was wonderful. Simply wonderful!

Wednesday, I am grateful...

2008-08-13T19:16:00.003-05:00

...for my absolutely delightful dog Toshio, who makes me laugh even when I am feeling under the weather.

This would have been a more appropriate picture for Friday's cheesecake post. I took this photo right after it arrived, as Toshio was licking his chops under the (very messy) table.

Toshio is such a strange dog but he makes me laugh. He's become fond of the mailman and other such delivery people (unless I am home alone as he gets overprotective of me and shows his scary bark). When the mailman or courier is dropping off a package, he gets excited and yips at the door. The mailman recognizes him now and breaks the news to him, "it's not for you, Fido", in a rough French accent and a laugh. He'll poke his nose at the box until you open it. He'll sit like an angel, expecting there to be treats or toys for him in the package. My mom's gift packages usually contain something of that nature for her furry grandchild. Somehow, he got the idea in his head that every package must contain a toy and a treat. It must!

Needless to say, he totally thought the cheesecake was for him!

Tuesday, I am grateful...

2008-08-13T19:06:00.002-05:00

...for my two little furry nieces that I will be meeting for the first time, a week from today.

I've accepted the fact that I will never be an Auntie. My sister and her husbands have such big hearts that they have turned their home into a small petting zoo. They love rescuing animals.

When my sister came out to visit me, she got to meet her "nephew" Toshio. She's been around dogs before but never lived with one (much like how I was before Toshio). Toshio became her best buddy, following her around and giving her kisses. He was so terribly sad when she went back home. He even refused to eat that day.

Toshio must have won her heart because they ended up adopting two little dogs. They were found in a home where someone horded animals. These two had to be adopted together and not many people are up to that challenge. It's been a challenge, to say the least, but they love their dogs and are giving them a loving home finally. I can't wait to meet them! Mae is a pomeranian mix and the little shaggy terrier mix is Minnie.

So, now I'm an Auntie to two dogs, five guinea pigs, and a goldfish!

Monday, I am grateful...

2008-08-13T19:03:00.001-05:00

...for lazy, sunny afternoon naps.

Sunday, I am grateful...

2008-08-13T19:00:00.002-05:00

...for comfort food when you're feeling under the weather.

Forgive the tardy blog entries. Both my partner and I woke up on Sunday morning feeling awful. Ah, summer colds! Thank goodness for comfort foods like soup and toast. There's not much more I can say. I'm grateful for soup!

Saturday, I am grateful...

2008-08-13T18:52:00.002-05:00

...for sharing a part of our friend's special day.

Our friends got married this past Saturday. They're somewhat newer friends of ours. It was a beautiful wedding reception, a "goth n' roll" wedding. We all had to wear black and/or red, the cake was coffin shaped, and there was spooky accessories and treats to be enjoyed by all. The stunning bride wore black lace and a corset, while the groom wore a bright red zoot suit. It was very cool! I actually forgot to bring my camera so I stole a pic from the bride's camera of the crowd (I'm sort of in the middle talking with the girl who has red in her bangs and I'll let you pick out who my significant other is. Hint: he's the one that sort of looks anti-social!).

I was really happy to be invited to their reception. They're good, genuine people and I wish them nothing but the best for their future!

Friday, I am grateful...

2008-08-08T22:46:00.002-05:00

...for surprises from faraway friends and cheesecake!

Have I mentioned to y'all that I really need to upload all the photos I have taken over the last few months? Once again, this is a recycled shot. However, it is cheesecake and it goes with the theme!

My friend and his wife sent me a surprise hand-delivered cheesecake today. I can say that I have never had a hand delivered cheesecake before! They're in Arizona and found a place in Montreal to deliver it. Wow, what a treat! It made me laugh that the both the card it came with and the little plastic sign on the cake said "happy birthday". It's not my birthday, not even close. Just a little joke between us regarding birthdays and ninjas. Don't ask.

It was a very sweet gesture and I'm very grateful for that. I hope one day I will be able to meet his wife and his daughter and the little one that's on it's way.

Thursday, I am grateful...

2008-08-07T19:12:00.002-05:00

...for knowing that sometimes I am not a very pleasant person and for being big enough to admit when I was wrong. I am grateful for being able to apologizing.

No, I am not giving myself a pat of the back and declaring that I am the bigger person. There's no bigger person in this case. To put it simply, a little lack of sleep and a whole lot of hormones can be a deadly combination! I've been cranky and probably not the most pleasant person to be around or to talk with. I have apologized.

Wednesday, I am grateful...

2008-08-06T15:14:00.002-05:00

...for having my sister visit me back in May.

One of the highlights of my spring/summer was my sister coming to see me. I have yet to upload all of our photos. Here is one of me during our visit to the fantastic botanical gardens in Montreal, in the gorgeous Chinese garden.

I had a blast with her, despite having moments of anxiety. The great thing about my sister is that she completely understood my anxiety and knew how to deal with it - by laughing it off, my being sensitive about it, and by making me realize that things aren't that bad. We had an amazing time together. We did the touristy sight seeing thing, we spent quality time with my dog, and we spent many late nights just giggling about nothing. It was wonderful.

Tuesday, I am grateful...

2008-08-05T13:11:00.002-05:00

...for my father. Happy birthday, Dad! And happy birthday to my father-in-law as well! I am grateful for how welcome the in-laws have made me feel in this city.

I know, I have been a stranger. There are various reasons to explain my disappearing act. Today feels like the perfect day to come back to this blog. I have been ridiculously sleep deprived this last month or so and it's catching up to me. I woke up feeling angry and frustrated. I will turn to this blog again to open my eyes to everything good around me. I think I need that in my life right now.

The reasons for my absence is fairly simple. This year has been on the difficult side. A lot of things happened all at once earlier this year and the outcome was terrible anxiety. It was a lot of work drama (not involving myself), it was my grandmother being ill and then passing away, it was my dog getting attacked by another dog. It doesn't sound like much but anxiety crept up on me during this. There came a point where I felt extremely nervous and shaky to leave my house and I made excuses not to go out. These last few months have been all about improving myself - understanding anxiety, talking to a professional about it, bettering myself in various ways (still a work in progress!), and decompressing. I feel a lot better as far as anxiety goes. The one thing that needs to be fixed is this lack of sleep I have been experiencing. This neighborhood has been awfully noisy this summer and the lack of sleep is finally catching up to me. I have been thinking about creating a new blog, all about my adventures in anxiety. I'm not sure if it would be interesting to anyone but myself though.

I'm glad to be back here and hopefully I still have some readers left. I missed you!

I will warn you, some of my photos may be recycled. We finally set up my laptop. I have tons of photos to upload but I have to burn a bunch of photos off of my partner's computer before uploading the new ones! There's no photo editing program on this laptop either.

I hope everyone is well and enjoying summer.

Friday, I am grateful...

2008-05-02T23:21:00.002-05:00

...for my famous little fly-trap!

I posted this photo on my Flickr site a while back. This week, I was contacted by a book publisher in Asia. He asked me if he could, by any chance, use this photograph for one of their biology textbooks for children, in both the English and Chinese language. Of course, I said yes!

I'm actually very surprised that he asked permission. I've read many a horror story about peoples Flickr photos being used without permission for advertising or what not. He could have taken my photo and used it - when would I be reading a children's textbook in Asia anyhow? Anyway, I agreed to let them use my photos. I'm not demanding money (nor was any offered, and that's okay). My name gets cited though and if the book is approved, I will get a copy. I'm simply happy that my little photo of my little plant is going to help children learn. Hopefully...I know I doodled a lot in my textbooks when I was young, ha ha.

Thursday, I am grateful...

2008-05-01T23:57:00.002-05:00

...for amusing and making my mom laugh.

I'll be honest. I don't really have a photo that suits what I am grateful for today. I don't think my mom wants her face being shown all over the internet either.

I talked to my mom on and off today. I amused her with some silly stories and questions about baking/cooking. I made her laugh about something or another. It doesn't matter what it was about, I kept her a little occupied during a rough time. I know I am far away but I'm glad I can still make her laugh and be there.

Wednesday, I am grateful...

2008-05-01T00:10:00.002-05:00

...for funny surprises for no reason.

Some gals get flowers from their significant others. I get retro scribblers with Burton Cummings on the cover! Ah, what a riot. I love it. I don't know what I will write in the scribbler but I'm thinking about bringing it back to Winnipeg each visit and jotting down tidbits about the man.

On a completely unrelated topic, I don't know why but I look really barrel-chested here. I had to address that because it simply looks rather odd.

Tuesday, I am grateful...

2008-04-29T22:23:00.003-05:00

...for treating myself to fancy bars of homemade soap!

I don't treat myself to too many things and it's about time that I did! When I was at the vet's office with Toshio a few weeks ago, the receptionist gave me a sample of handmade soap from a nearby business. I couldn't get enough of this 10g sample of raspberry and cream soap. I was impressed too - I love raspberries and it's rare that you find a body butter or soap that smells good and not like artificial raspberries. I still have the second sample in my purse because it smells that great.

So, I took a walk to the shop on a bright, sunny day and splurged! I bought a couple of bars of lavender and vanilla bean for my mom for Mother's Day. For myself, I came home with jasmine and calendula (which smells interesting), satsuma and guava (which smells bright and invigorating), and raspberry and cream (which is simply heavenly). The shop was airy and friendly - you weren't knocked out by the aromas of many different smells like in some body shops. The owner was a sweetheart. She gave me a sample of the satsuma and guava body butter which I want now!

Check out her shop's site - Mooka. I swear, the best bars of soap...ever!

Monday, I am grateful...

2008-04-28T22:36:00.002-05:00

...for trying to help myself.

I couldn't find the right photo to capture the feelings of anxiety. So, you'll have to deal with a shot from Christmas time - ha ha. I guess Christmas equals anxiety for some!

Another one of the reasons why I took a little break from the blog was because my anxiety was so incredibly high. I even took time off work to decompress. I know I am not the only one out there that has anxiety or experienced panic. Knowing that is reassuring, in a way. It helps me talk it out with others. My anxiety is more or less on the mend, if you will.

A few weeks ago, I swallowed my pride and found someone to talk to. A professional. And some may say that I shouldn't announce that but on the other hand - why should I be ashamed or keep it hush hush? Yes, I've been seeing a therapist. And honestly, it's been a good thing for me. Not only that, I am grateful that I am getting things off my chest. I am trying to find a way to determine what worries are reasonable to worry about. I am grateful that the government has people to talk to like this for free because I wouldn't be able to afford it otherwise.

It's good to talk to someone.

Sunday, I am grateful...

2008-04-27T17:27:00.003-05:00

...that my Toshio is happy and healthy once again! Look at that smile!

One of the reasons why I took a little bit of an extended break from blogging was because my precious Boo-Boo dog got in a fight and was injured. As you can tell by the first two photos, it was pretty bad (those were taken about four or five days after the attack). It was a really traumatic incident for both the dog and me (probably more so for me). During the first few days, he could not walk because his leg was swollen and infected. He had a fever. He wouldn't eat or drink water so I had to feed him by hand. It was also the weekend when my partner was out of town so it was extra rough on the two of us. Those first couple of nights, I pulled some all-nighters just to watch how he was doing. I waited until my partner got home so we could take him to the vet together. You see, he refused to walk down the stairs with me (we live in a second floor walk-up apartment). He is skittish around men so it wasn't possible for him to be carried down our steep stairs. He is afraid of cars because he was thrown out of one right before he came into our lives. He needed his daddy.

Luckily, I was surrounded by some good friends that weekend. They went the extra mile. My friend's mom spent all day on the phone, searching for a vet to do a house call (to no avail) but she got one to write a prescription for an anti-biotic. After we took him to the vet, we spent the next ten days or so flushing out his wounds with a solution via a catheter. He was a good little patient.

I'm very proud of my dog. He was very good with not nibbling at his boo boos. He sat reasonably still when we had to take care of his wounds and he loved taking his medication (covered in peanut butter). He was a little scared of the car ride to the vet's but he succeeded. And he was wonderful with the vet - it really surprised us!

So, as you can tell by the pic, he is happy and healthy. And his "mommy" is very, very grateful of that.

Saturday, I am grateful...

2008-04-26T16:22:00.002-05:00

...for all the good times, all the memories, and for you.

I thought today would be a perfect and bittersweet time to start posting again in this gratitude blog, after all this time off.

My grandmother passed away yesterday evening. Though I could not be there to say goodbye, I know that she knew that she was always in my mind and my heart and in my thoughts. I wish I could have thanked her for all the things she has taught me - how to knit, how to bake bread, how to laugh at things in our very own way, and that it was okay to cry. But I think she knew that I was grateful. I have so many good memories of her. What a strong and lovely woman she was.

And I think this little blog of mine taught me a thing or two as well. It's taught me to dwell not on the negative things but, rather, focus more on the positive things. That has always been a challenge for me.

I am left with good memories. I am grateful she did not suffer too much. I hope to be strong for my mother, even though I am far away.

Do all the things you want to do while you are young and able. That's what she told me the last time I went home. I will and you'll be missed.

I'm Still Alive!

2008-04-05T23:21:00.002-05:00

Hello all!

I will be cracking that whip and getting myself back into blogging my gratitude! I know I have been disappearing, on and off. The last few months have been a little difficult and I was actually enjoying "me" time, away from my "desk".

But, it's beginning to look like spring at last and I'm feeling better. My anxiety is low and I am trying to help myself, heal myself. I have a brand new metal bodied ukulele - so I'll be learning a new instrument. And my dog is feeling better too.

I intended on starting to blog again last weekend when I had the place to myself. Unfortunately, my dog ended up getting attacked by another dog and it was bad. He's doing better and is up to his old antics. It was a scary weekend though for all of us though.

Will be back soon! Don't you worry! :)

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2008-04-05T23:14:00.002-05:00

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Tuesday, I am grateful...

2008-03-11T19:48:00.001-05:00

...for making steps, for almost feeling perfect, for learning to breathe deep, and for understanding that I am not going under.